My First Babysitting Experience was a sham. The anecdote you read was inspired by my actual first babysitting experience but was given the sit-com treatment. The second and third paragraphs are pretty much the straight truth; the rest is complete tall tale. When I saw him chewing on something I asked him what it was. He told me it was a Dorito and dug another one out of the couch for me to share. I fished some more chip bits out and tossed them all into the garbage. I had him drink a glass of milk just in case but there was no panic or worry on my part. He was a bit stubborn about drinking the milk so the line about "If you don't drink this you are going to die!" was verbatim truth. The death I was speaking about was me pummeling him for disobeying the babysitter though, not a fear of poison Doritos.

9 out of 16 of you got this one correct. One point each to:

Holly
Helen
DeAnna
Paul
diamond dave
Denise
Rob
Wendy
Jeff

Clancy maintains his perfect record of never getting a Shamming/Sharing point and unfortunately Boudicca remains totally bereft of points. Don't worry, Bou. The season is yet young.

Posted by: Jim at 09:55 AM | Comments (5) | Add Comment
Post contains 217 words, total size 2 kb.

Da rules: I post an anecdote that may or may not be true. You guess which it is, based on your knowledge of me and my curious ways. Whoever gets it right gets a point when the contest closes. Here we go:

My first babysitting experience

I was a young teen and had managed to fool my parents into believing I was a young, responsible man. Boy, did they find out different.

My first stint at babysitting my little brother (he's seven years younger) was to be a two hour stretch while the parents went out to a fancy dinner. While they dressed to the nines I amused Lil Bro and everybody was in good humor by the time they were ready to leave. I managed to completely hide my incredible nervousness at the responsibility being placed in my hands.

About five minutes after they drove off I went to the bathroom. I re-entered the family room to see the couch cushions on the floor and Lil Bro happily chewing on something. I immediately panicked. What was he eating? A bug? A razor blade? Coins? Anything at all could have been stuck underneath those cushions!

I jumped at him and tackled him to the cushions and started yelling at him to spit it out. I realize in hindsight that this was not the optimal method to get food out of a little kid in a calm and effective manner. He started bawling and choking on what was in his mouth. I dug in with my fingers in the patented Rescusi-Ann preliminary lifesaving routine. I'd had CPR training with the Boy Scouts only a short while before so the half remembered techniques were dangerously effective. The mouth clear worked and I didn't even lose a finger. more...

Posted by: Jim at 10:26 AM | Comments (21) | Add Comment
Post contains 1192 words, total size 7 kb.

1 Me thinks you're shamming.

Posted by: Holly at March 18, 2005 11:44 AM (3SP8e)

2 Sham. Who the hell keeps activated charcoal on hand? (PS-it doesn't make you throw up, although ipecac does.)

Posted by: Helen at March 18, 2005 12:16 PM (Vd6WF)

3 Total Sham!

Posted by: DeAnna at March 18, 2005 12:17 PM (IdVP4)

4 Sham. Though I sooo want it to be true.

Posted by: Paul at March 18, 2005 12:38 PM (vbP6L)

5 Sounds far fetched. But I'll disagree with everyone else and say it is TRUE!

Posted by: Huts at March 18, 2005 01:05 PM (x7s+C)

6 true. Dear God i hope it's true. because if it is, that is arguably the BEST babysitting story ever. :-D

Posted by: tommy at March 18, 2005 01:21 PM (VCRgB)

7 I'm going with TRUE. Other players take note - I have NEVER guessed a Shamming or Sharing correct. Ever.

Posted by: Clancy at March 18, 2005 02:51 PM (JxYJc)

8 Oh it has to be true. Sounds exactly like what a freaked out kid would do.

Posted by: Machelle at March 18, 2005 02:53 PM (ZAyoW)

9 Sharing. Although, I'm with Helen about the charcoal and it has me questioning my guess. But I'll stay with sharing.

Posted by: Tiffani at March 18, 2005 04:01 PM (KE4Gu)

10 Yah, charcoal is a neutralizer. It's the Ipecac that induces vomiting. But charcoal does not neutralize the vomitorious effects of Ipecac. hehe

Posted by: Jim at March 18, 2005 04:18 PM (tyQ8y)

11 "My little brother ate poison! Waaaaaah! I need my Mom! Waaaaaah! I don't know what to do! Waaaaaaah!" Bullshit. I've never known a teen to react that way over a stale Dorito. Now, if you made fun of him and said "You're going to die. Nyanyanya!" or "the hospital is going to put this HUGE tube put down your throat to pump your stomach, hahahahaha!" I would believe you. After all, that's what my brother and sister did to me...

Posted by: diamond dave at March 18, 2005 04:38 PM (/816A)

12 Hey, I was a very sensitive child. And I was only 13 at the time. I didn't turn bitter and cynical until 15.

Posted by: Jim at March 18, 2005 05:03 PM (tyQ8y)

13 Complete sham. Boys do not freak out over eating old, stale, or moldy Doritos.

Posted by: Denise at March 18, 2005 05:43 PM (JTlEe)

14 Sham! ... cos ... you're an only child???

Posted by: Rob at March 18, 2005 06:48 PM (n5PpA)

15 Had two brothers by blood (Lil Bro is stil around). Also two sisters and another brother by marriage of parental units.

Posted by: Jim at March 18, 2005 06:54 PM (MDLz3)

16 Total Sham. I agree with Dave. I can't see ANY teenager, much less a boy, crying over a moldy Dorito. In fact, I would be surprised if you didn't dare him to eat it. By the way - if you thought Sham because of the charcoal, remember it's a kid, they don't know what's what with the vomit stuff. But I still say SHAM!!!

Posted by: Wendy at March 18, 2005 09:08 PM (lVGGv)

17 That has to be a sham. AHAHAH! Ipecac for doritos!

Posted by: Jeff at March 19, 2005 11:09 AM (b5dIr)

18 True and I'm scared that you procreated... ;-)

Posted by: Boudicca at March 19, 2005 09:51 PM (z7nbM)

19 I'm saying true. And I'm glad this is back. No one spins a yarn quite like you...

Posted by: Simon at March 20, 2005 10:24 PM (UKqGy)

20 Share......

Posted by: Mitzi Moore at March 21, 2005 07:38 AM (OZ5tI)

21 I'm going with mostly true, I think there is some exageration. However if it's not true you know an old friend of mine who did do something like that what he was in 7th grade. Although he used kingsford charcole.

Posted by: contagion at March 21, 2005 08:20 AM (Q5WxB)

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