The Milieu Of Sucky In An Otherwise Unsucky Milieu
There seems to be a general consensus that I suck. And not just in a general way, I have a gift for sucking (shut up, Skank). This has been perpetuated for some time and it's unfair. It was unfair when I had my old blog and it is unfair now. Repeat it often enough and it becomes true. Perception becomes reality. I guess if you perceive me to suck, I do suck. In your tiny, rotten brains.
I'm not exactly sure where it started but I know a few people who gave it legs. One is a cranky little prostitute from Wisconsin. Or maybe it's Iowa. It doesn't matter. All midwestern states are tornado-prone dustbowls that might as well belong to Canada for all their usefulness. And then there is someone who blogs on this very site. You know who you are. And then there is another person who blogs on this site who was instrumental in sticking the suck label on me. You also know who you are. There are many other bloggers, too numerous to mention here, who jumped on the bandwagon or just honestly thought I sucked. But I digress.
My point is - I'm not really that bad. Look at Instapundit. Yawn. All he does is link to articles and blogs that are more boring than his. If you think he's boring, don't dare click his links. And if he talks about his friggin' camera one more time, I'm going to gouge out my eyes with a melon-baller.
And how about Frank J.? Illiterate. Mind-numbing. Arrogant. Overrated. You see what I did there? Get it? Come on! That's both funny and clever.
Well, I think I clearly and concisely laid out my argument of why, not only do I not suck, but why I'm better than most of the bloggers out there. Did I mention that I've been quoted in the NY Times? And I was praised in some Tennessee newspaper about my extensive coverage of Hurricane Whoever It Was That Year. What more proof do you need?
Don't beat yourselves up. You retards know not what you do.
Apology accepted!
PS: Also, I believe I used the word "milieu" correctly in the title. Further proof that I don't in fact suck.
Posted by: Pixy Misa at
01:49 PM
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1
Well at least talking about how you suck got you off your ass and you finally posted . HA!
And I do believe that Miss Jen is from Iowa. And... and... while I'm at it, I live near Chicago which is more of a tax ho than a dustbowl.
Posted by: Jackie at April 26, 2007 02:12 PM (rLwj8)
2
Don't make me go to my extensive archives. I can PROVE you suck.
Posted by: Paul at April 26, 2007 02:30 PM (IpZQr)
3
Jackie - I've been posting my butt off. It's the other lazy assholes on this site that could stand to post more than once every three weeks.
Paul - no need to get crazy. Just relax, have a few scotches and forget I ever wrote this post. I love ya, buddy.
Posted by: Bill at April 26, 2007 03:59 PM (vMIzT)
4
Bill, if we didn't like you, we wouldn't abuse you. We'd just ignore you.
Posted by: Jennifer at April 26, 2007 06:49 PM (11xUe)
Posted by: Ted at April 26, 2007 10:26 PM (+OVgL)
6
That was funny, Ted.
Not.
Love ya, Jen!
Posted by: Bill at April 27, 2007 09:10 AM (vMIzT)
7
Bill.
You fucking suck bro.
Posted by: shank at April 27, 2007 05:13 PM (LDIDK)
8
OK just linked from some far off blog. If you do suck (I am reserving judgement) it is in the most endearing way. I laughed so freaking hard reading your blogs and I am not easily amused.
OK I am easily amused but still endearing is my vote.
Posted by: Tara at April 28, 2007 12:40 AM (kpYdj)
9
So Tara; you waltz in here from some fuckall link and assume, because it made you laugh your ass off, that such mirth puts you in a position to tell us whether or not Bill sucks?
And beyond that you admit to basically being a mindless moron who votes with all the volition of a trained housecat?
Infuriating. Go fuck yourself. Hard.
In the ass with a pasta scoop. Sideways.
Yeah, turn that bastards sideways and make it hurt you mental midget.
Posted by: shank at April 28, 2007 01:32 AM (LDIDK)
10
Shank, what did we tell you about going off your meds?
Posted by: Jennifer at April 28, 2007 11:31 AM (MCfza)
11
Thanks for the reminder.
Posted by: shank at April 28, 2007 05:46 PM (LDIDK)
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Life, Liberty And The Pursuit of Crappiness
Have you ever wanted to have a drink at say, 11:00 in the morning (who hasn't) but you feel guilty because it's too early and you use that old chestnut, "It's 5:00 somewhere!"? Me too!
Well, why can't you use that same excuse for work? I'm giving it a shot.
Posted by: Pixy Misa at
02:10 PM
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1
I'm not a big 'Life Philosophy' kind of guy, but I do have one mantra that has always rung true: The best time for a beer is now.
Posted by: shank at April 13, 2007 02:37 PM (LDIDK)
2
Mine is "fuck moderation".
Posted by: Bill at April 13, 2007 03:20 PM (vMIzT)
Posted by: Margi at April 13, 2007 04:41 PM (+hlqP)
4
When in Rome, do a Roman.
Posted by: Jim at April 14, 2007 10:42 AM (oqu5j)
5
"Assume everyone is an asshole until they prove otherwise."
Posted by: Paul at April 14, 2007 11:54 AM (IpZQr)
6
Never sit in the same chair that a fat naked lady sat in. You're likely to sit in a gooey, foul-smelling puddle.
Posted by: Bill at April 16, 2007 08:43 AM (vMIzT)
7
I'm with Paul... no that's not my mantra...
Weirdness is a positive trait
Posted by: Oorgo at April 20, 2007 02:43 PM (ZUQGo)
8
All of the nastiest solution to forget the person is usually to be taking up space exact adjacent to these individuals knowing you can‘s buy them.
destockchine destockchine
Posted by: destockchine at February 01, 2013 12:37 PM (Tufqo)
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