In his latest post, Skank mentioned blowing donkeys (nice hobby there, Skank!). Which got me to thinking. I once saw a video of a chick blowing a horse. As if that weren't disturbing enough, I was 13 when I saw it. I was over at my sister's boyfriends' house after he had a bachelors party and he asked me if I wanted to see some porn. I was 13 so I said, "Hell yeah!". And he puts on this video of a chick blowing a horse. I was like - that's not porn, that's illegal. Do you know how big a horse dick is? Can you imagine how hard it must be to get it in your mouth (no pun intended)? Now imagine the amount of sperm it ejaculates. The chick looked like a horse had just ejaculated all over her for lack of a better description.

But what I really want to know is what would possess someone? Whether it's a horse or a dog or a goat. What's the attraction? Human genitals are ugly enough. Must we start licking other species genitals? What possesses a normal woman to fuck her Border Collie? Besides the fact that it's hung like a Border Collie. Loneliness? Boredom? The thrill of doing it doggie-style...with an actual dog? I mean who does doggie-style better than a dog.

I find this absolutely fascinating. The same way I find a train wreck fascinating. Enough so that I've decided to start a research study to determine why people, but specifically females, will have sex with horses and dogs. The study will be called "Human Females and Their Physical Attraction to Equines, Bovines and Canines - What The Fuck?" If any of my female readers have had sex or thought about having sex with any four-legged animal over say - 30 lbs., and would like to be part of the study, describe your experience(s) in comments. I will analyze this data and report back with my findings on the psychology of these twisted freaks. All participants will be compensated. And when I say compensated, I mean I'll rent a few ponies for an afternoon and you whackos can have at 'em.

Do you think the animals like it? Do they care? Do they have the mental capacity to feel violated? Or do they just think, "What the hell is she doing down there?". The answers to these questions will be harder to answer. But I promise to get to the bottom of this with exhaustive and extensive anecdotal evidence.

So please, I need your participation. For science.

Thank you in advance,

"Dr." Will

*The views and ramblings of Dr. Will are not necessarily the views of the management at Snooze Button Dreams.

Posted by: Pixy Misa at 03:37 PM | Comments (8) | Add Comment
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