Via The Corporate Mommy comes the Funniest Caption Ever. She also posts a reason why I don't want kids. For another reason to not have kids, read the Google cache for the first hit for this search.

(Full disclosure: Once I flushed a diaper down the toilet--this was in the 60's, which means it was a cloth diaper, not a disposable. My parents ended up having to have the lawn dug up to get the pipes fixed and I don't think they were too happy about that...and that, basically, is yet another reason why I don't want kids. That, and remembering the time I caught the curtains on fire.) (What it comes down to is it's self-preservation, man.)

Posted by: Victor at 06:54 AM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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He's probably trying to get back to his hotel. Only you can help him out!

(My best was 49 meters. Poor Jim is still asleep in the gutter.)

Posted by: Victor at 07:21 PM | Comments (5) | Add Comment
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Then you've got to check out the newly redesigned IMAO. Catblogging taking to the Frankth degree.

Posted by: Jim at 04:04 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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He doesn't do it often but when he does it he does it sooo well.

At least that's what the chicks say.

Go see.

Posted by: Jim at 02:03 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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I saw this a while ago and was reminded of it by Claire.

English Genius

You scored 100% Beginner, 100% Intermediate, 100% Advanced, and 93% Expert!

You have a godlike intellect. You are a beacon unto the idiot masses who should fall at your feet in humble supplication in the forlorn hope that your benediction will raise them from their ignorant stupor. Please contact me for possible chromosonal exchange. *Wink* *Wink*

Thank you so much for taking my test. I hope you enjoyed it!

To take the test, *click*

Ah...English. It's like a second language to me.

Posted by: Jim at 12:55 PM | Comments (4) | Add Comment
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The one for when somebody gets axed from their job because of their weblog? The name of the first person to get dumped on like that became the term for having it done to you. What's that word?

Well, whatever the hell the word is, it happened to 8 Z E R O 8. His is one of the blogs I found on that click exchange thing. What was the name of that thing? Damn, I'm bad with names today.

Anyway, he made it to the blogroll because he was funnier than me. For all of you who didn't know it, that's the only real requirement to get on my blogroll - just be more entertaining than me. Seriously, if I can entertain myself better than you can entertain me, what do I need you for? And remember, masturbation is entertainment so you have to be able to beat that. No pun intended.

Anywho...Somebody at his work ratted him out and they fired him. And that sucks big, huge amounts of vacuum.

Go visit, commiserate, spread the word, help him find a job, and click on his GoogleAds (no tipjar over there).

Posted by: Jim at 04:18 PM | Comments (6) | Add Comment
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Do Not Press

(Yanked from IMAO)

* Yes, I realize that the title has nothing to do with the entry. You try coming up with a title for a three word post.

Posted by: Jim at 11:18 AM | Comments (5) | Add Comment
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1 That's from The Matrix, isn't it?

Posted by: Victor at May 03, 2005 12:17 PM (L3qPK)

2 Ding! Ding! Stealth point.

Posted by: Jim at May 03, 2005 12:22 PM (tyQ8y)

3 Dang! Busted by the network filters! I think that's twice today...

Posted by: Nate at May 03, 2005 03:17 PM (uKuUC)

4 It's also from Dog Soldiers :-) But your stealth is slipping Jim, that was a little blatent

Posted by: Rob at May 04, 2005 05:04 AM (kXZI6)

5 I was in a giving mood.

Posted by: Jim at May 04, 2005 09:26 AM (tyQ8y)

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