IÂ’ve never given Denmark much thought. They seem innocuous enough. I get the Scandinavian and the Low Countries mixed up. Are they the folks with the windmills? DoesnÂ’t matter. Anyway, theyÂ’ve got Saladin and his lot marching on them like the fucking Third Reich over these cartoons.

And if thatÂ’s not enough, now theyÂ’ve got Muslim agitators all over the globe stirring up more violence. It pains me to say this, but at least the hippies werenÂ’t violent. Maybe if these guys hit the hookah a little more often weÂ’d have less bellyaching from them.

I rarely post politics and I’m not starting now, but it’s painfully obvious to the sane people of the world that as a global collective we need to stop wiping the asses of these fucking extremists. Pretty soon it’s going to be “Step on a crack, break Mohammed’s back,” and they’ll be rioting and burning every time someone doesn’t say Mother, may I before they get on an eastbound freeway.

There is no reasoning with extremists.

Now maybe the rest of the world will wake up and see what’s coming down the pike in the long run—because it’s coming. Mark my words, there will be a day in the not-so-distant future where countries will be standing in line to be our allies.

Posted by: Pixy Misa at 08:42 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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Ancient History

First of all, who was Valentine? Nobody really knows. The Roman Catholic Church lists three St. Valentines, all of whom were martyred.

ThereÂ’s a lot of legends and I guess if I gave a shit I could list some, but for the sake of brevity letÂ’s keep the story moving. In ancient Rome, some fertility ritual or another took place around February 15th. TheyÂ’d slaughter a goat and a dog and then dip strips of their hides into the blood. ThatÂ’s when the fun began.

Then boys would run around the city slapping girls with the bloody hide in order to make them more fertile. Between that and all the drinking from lead pots itÂ’s no wonder the Roman empire collapsed, but thatÂ’s another story.

IÂ’m losing interest in this post, but if you want to have yourself a real Valentines celebration this year youÂ’re probably going to jail for animal cruelty so it may be a good idea to just stick with a card and some flowers.

Modern History

Guys purchase gaudy lingerie and give it to their girlfriends. I donÂ’t know what theyÂ’re thinking, but they do this. IÂ’ve had conversations with guys over this before and thereÂ’s no getting through to them.

“That’s a gift for you dumbass. You’re supposed get a gift for them. No ulterior motives. You know…something romantic. What you’ve got there looks like a very cheaply made undergarment for an 1870s era prostitute.”

“No way, Dude. She’s going to be into this.”

I donÂ’t know why people donÂ’t listen.

Posted by: Pixy Misa at 02:00 PM | Comments (5) | Add Comment
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Turns out more people watched the American Idol auditions last night than the Grammy awards.

I have little use for either show, but the GrammyÂ’s annoy the shit out of me, much like the Oscars. I canÂ’t understand AmericaÂ’s fascination with these self-indulgent bullshit festivals.

I have almost no respect for todayÂ’s music world. These hogs have been at the trough for a long goddamned time. WhereÂ’s the talent? Ah, donÂ’t even get me started.

Anyway, American Idol swept the ratings and in doing so, poked a finger in the eyes of U2, Madonna and I imagine a great many rappers and breathy boy band style crooners. I wouldnÂ’t know because I hold the whole music industry in contempt. I havenÂ’t purchased a CD or song recorded in the last five years. And I still buy a shitload of music every week.

IÂ’m absolutely thrilled that viewers would rather watch people embarrass and humiliate themselves on TV than tune in to watch more of these overblown windbags talk about how wonderful they all are as a collective.

Posted by: Pixy Misa at 09:56 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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Is anybody surprised by this? They have the mentality of little kids.

They never really evolved from Lord of the Flies.

Posted by: Pixy Misa at 03:03 PM | Comments (4) | Add Comment
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Why civilization is crumbling— reason number 78,634:

Â…Today, men are buying themselves bracelets, rings and pendant necklaces with increasing frequency and wearing their bling with a confidence and flair heretofore unseen in the Western world, according to fashion experts and industry observers.
Â…

Â…"These super-masculine guys are saying, 'Jewelry's cool, and I'll show you why because I'll wear it.' So as a result, men are thinking, 'Hey, it's OK for me to wear this.' " Â…

No. No itÂ’s not. I cannot abide a man wearing a shitload of jewelry. You know how men decorate apartments? A couple of cinder blocks and a plank for a couch?

Well, that how they pick jewelry too. I draw the line at a watch. And my weddinÂ’ ring.

Posted by: Pixy Misa at 01:24 PM | Comments (12) | Add Comment
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