September 09, 2003
9/11 is not his birthday. If it was, we would celebrate it on that date. 9/9 isn't his birthday either. 9/11 is when his preschool teacher wants to celebrate it. You see, he only goes to school on Tuesdays and Thursdays. Today (Tuesday, 9/9) is a birthday party for another kid who's birthday is also not today so the closest day available for Bacon would be 9/11.
We told his teacher (Ms. Nancy) that we did not want to have his birthday celebrated on 9/11. We explained that if his birthday was actually on 9/11 that would be totally different but that we have a serious problem with moving a party to that date. We feel it is disrespectful and just...wrong...to have an anniversary party on that day when the actual anniversary isn't actually on that day.
She said that she understood but that if the birthday wasn't celebrated on 9/11 then they would not be able to do it at all this year. The calendar was drawn up before the school year started and there is not another day that could serve. This strikes me as bullshit. These littles have a school year of around 36 weeks. Two classes a week makes over 70 days of school. For the next 8 months there is not a single day that is not scheduled so heavily that there's no time between now and the end of the year for her to lead the kids in a round of "Happy Birthday"? Bullshit, Ms Nancy. Bullshit.
So what do we do? Forbid the in-school celebration? It's just the above-mentioned singing during snack time and an activity or two. No huge loss. He doesn't care about the attention at all - a birthday to him means that he gets money. Since he won't get money there he's not going to care either way. It could actually make him sad when he gets the lead-up and then there's no cash reward. But all of the other students will have their birthday day, will he wonder why they all do but he doesn't?
We don't want to rob him of his due but we also want all of our kids to understand the solemnity and importance of 9/11. Oh, don't worry - I'm not going to push it down their throats. Just as much as they are ready to understand, same as Easter and Memorial Day and the rest of the days of import. But is there a way out of our rock and hard place dilemma?
Posted by: Jim at
09:33 AM
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