A fsh.

(I slay me! Hoo, boy, no more coffee for this guy!)

Posted by: Jim at 10:42 AM | Comments (4) | Add Comment
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Your resistance is futile for I am the King of Cheeses!

Your cheese rating is: Stilton

The King of cheeses. Stilton is a rich, tangy cheese with blue/grey marbled mould veins running throughout, and a dry, crusty, inedible rind. Daniel Defoe mentioned Stilton as "a town famous for its cheeses" in 1727. It is milder than is continental counterparts, Roquefort and Gorgonzola, and is famed as a dessert cheese, best served with Port.

What's your cheese rating?

(Filched from Rob)

POINTS: Three points to the first person to name the source of this post title. Remember, no searches.

Posted by: Jim at 02:02 PM | Comments (10) | Add Comment
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I've had a few people ask just what points are and since I'm running short on flippant rejoinders I figured I'd just do a post and handle it the nice way.

Points are...well they're just points. When you earn them you go up on the Leader Board over in the sidebar. At a minimum this gets your link up on my site and might get some traffic to you. At a maximum this will be the culmination of your life and you can die happy. Most people end up somewhere between those two extremes. Maybe I'll give a prize to the top point holder at the end of the year. Anything's possible.

There are a couple of ways to earn points:

1. The most common is knowing the same obscure things that I do. When I recognize that I've used some wierd, odd, or little known phrase or bit of past culture I'll offer points to the first person who can name the source of what I've used. The more obscure I think the knowledge is, the more points I'll offer. Searching for the answer using the internet is not allowed for these. It's the honor system so there's no real way I could stop you (apart from the vicious hex I've put in place) but it's all for fun so why bother cheating?


2. Sometimes I'll have contests, like the .1 Million Invitational. The winner(s) of these contests will get points.


3. I'm not beyond bribery.


4. Or flattery.

There are two ways to keep abreast of point earning opportunities. The preferred method is to visit this site several times a day and read everything that's posted. The lazy bastard way is to put your email in the box at the bottom of the Snooze Points section of the sidebar and press the submit button. You'll get put into the subscription list and you'll get an email whenever a post is made where points are offered.

UPDATE: Button doohicky removed as it doesn't work. You'll just have to keep checking back after all.

UPDATE2: Button doohicky replaced as it does work now! Yay!

UPDATE3: This post is being attacked by a crapspambot so I must close the comments.

Posted by: Jim at 10:34 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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The Scene: A summer barbeque at our house. The sun is down and the rugrats are abed. Dopple-G, his wife, my own Lovely Wife and I are relaxing on the veranda with beers and cigars. Lovely Wife goes into the house to get a glass of wine. She returns with a bottle in one hand and a glass in the other. The bottle has about a half inch of wine in it.

Dopple-G: Why bother with a glass? There's barely a swig left in that bottle.

Lovely Wife: Because wine is drunk from glasses. Perhaps it's acceptable for Americans to drink from the bottle but I am European. I'm naturally more sophisticated.

At this point Lovely Wife is faced with a conundrum. Both hands have something in them. There are no flat surfaces ready at hand to put her glass upon. She solves the problem by biting the cork and spending considerable effort and no small amount of time to worry it out of the bottle. She then spits the cork across the veranda and prepares to pour the wine.

Dopple-G: (laughing) Oh, yeah. You're definitely more sophisticated. I probably would have used an armpit or something to get that out. And there's no way I could have spit that far for distance. Nowhere near sophisticated enough.

Lovely Wife realizes what she just did and starts laughing so hard that she drops her glass in the dirt. At this point she gives up and finishes off the wine with one good pull from the bottle.

So now you know why I call her Lovely Wife and not Sophisticated Wife.

Posted by: Jim at 10:23 AM | Comments (5) | Add Comment
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Man, I hate these things. I'm a sucker for deceptively simple looking games that prove complex and disturbingly interesting. This one seems really simple. Click on the block in the middle and drag it around to avoid the other blocks flying around. But then you start seeing developing patterns and an odd symmetry and the next thing you know 10 minutes have gone by.

Bah! I'm through with these things!

Well, maybe just one more time...

(Many curses upon Dopple-G's head for inflicting this on me)

Posted by: Jim at 09:46 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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1 I was caught playing that twice by my boss today . Evil maroon squre, I shake my fist at you and my paltry 18 seconds!

Posted by: goldie at February 04, 2004 10:28 AM (a7ksm)

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It always knows.
The flavor of fruit.
Just follow my snoot!

This little ditty is lodged firmly in my head this morning. I have no idea where it came from. As far as I know this jingle was retired many, many years ago. I also haven't actually seen Toucan Sam in I don't know how long.

So why do I have this bloody annoying Fruit Loops jingle bouncing around my grey matter? What synapse misfired to bring this annoying stuff out of cranial retirement? Is it a warning sign of some grand mental problem lurking just beneath the surface?

Of course some people would clarify that as another grand mental problem lurking just beneath the surface. Because they're all out to get me and they do stuff like that. What was that noise?!

[mumble mumble mumble]

Posted by: Jim at 09:22 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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This is not a political blog for one basic reason. Politics (and specifically politicians) generally disgust me. I do my duty and keep informed. I vote. I'll discuss particular items with interested parties. I'll joke and make fun of them. What I don't do is get involved in battling against the retards and asshats that get off on the partisan bullshit screeds that so pervade the blogoshpere and the Internet at large. I'm making an exception.

Sue is an AOL user and died* in the wool Kucinich vigilante who befouled my comments with a 500 word rant ALL IN CAPITAL LETTERS!WITHOUT SPACES BETWEEN THE SENTENCES!AND ENDING EVERY SINGLE STATEMENT WITH AN EXCLAMATION POINT!IT WAS, ODDLY ENOUGH, IN A REGULAR WEIGHTED FONT!MOST LIKELY BECAUSE SHE IS NOT INTELLIGENT ENOUGH TO USE THE [BOLD] TAG!

MY FIRST INCLINATION (oops, let's take that "caps" button off) was to just blacklist this mentally deficient character and be done with it but I decided to draw swords instead for a couple of reasons:

1. Although she's a retard it's quite possible that she is an honestly misguided retard. Too long under the aluminum foil and anybody could be convinced to put the Kucinich gun deep into their oral cavity.


2. I'm pretty strongly against censorship. This was pretty obviously a cut and paste screed so I wouldn't really feel bad about deleting it but there's still the principle of the thing. I was offended by the comment but I certainly wasn't harmed. It was also a reply to a post where I critized Kucinich for his heartless assault against our GIs so it was at least correctly placed.


3. I think that it's important that people who pretend to be a "Sue" be exposed for the idiots that they are, when they make it oh so apparent exactly what idiots they are. I know a bunch of "Sue" types and all of them are bright and lucid. It's painfully honest that whatever this freak is, she isn't a genuine "Sue". If I let this go unpunished I would be doing a disservice to the "Sue"s that are being impersonated.


4. How can I pass up the opportunity to pour out buckets of backloaded vitriol on such a worthy target?

Disclaimer: My political beliefs center around the concept of an elected official performing their job well and doing so within the bounds of the constraints laid upon them. For the President these constraints include little things like the Constitution, the Legislative Branch and the Judicial Branch. As Kucinich has openly stated he has no intention whatsoever of giving even lip service to those three (and others) I have classified him and anybody who supports him as a nuckfut. If you are a Kucinich supporter then you are a nuckfut. Yes, really honest and for true. Therefore, nuckfuts will quite likely be highly offended by reading the contents of the extended entry. I guess it's quite possible that they've already been offended by my words above as well as from being called out as the nuckfuts they are and I should probably have put this disclaimer way up at the top of the post for it to be the most effective. But that's okay - like I really care about offending a bunch of nuckfuts.

The Real Disclaimer: This is a long fisking. I was pissed when I wrote it. Seriously pissed. Over several days. It is not a jocular taking to task of a misguided commenter, it is a furious diatribe against a target of opportunity that has provided me with an outlet to unload months of accumulated pissedoffedness. I did not open a can of whoop-ass here, I tapped a keg. If you love Snooze Button Dreams for my lighthearted quirky humor, anecdotes of life & family and the occasional kooky jack-ass maneuver recorded for posterity then this is seriously not the entry for you. You've been warned.

With that said, let us continue to the extended entry where I fisk this jackass's screed. more...

Posted by: Jim at 02:56 PM | Comments (12) | Add Comment
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It's just another Jackson exposing their body parts to youngsters.

(Hat tip to Dopple-G)

Posted by: Jim at 06:37 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
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Pictures of "Nasty" girl Janet Jackson's well rounded right breast are plastered all over the place with commentary ranging from outraged to "yummilicious". My only comment is this:

How can you end up as a pedophile when you grow up with such awesome boobage around?

Posted by: Jim at 12:46 PM | Comments (18) | Add Comment
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1 Yeah - someone just told me about the pics on drudge. The pastie thing appears to have been a piercing... yuck

Posted by: Clancy at February 02, 2004 12:48 PM (EGVPL)

2 Because, doing just like wittle bruvver Michael, Janet's boobage was bought at the plastic surgeon general store.

Posted by: MommaBear at February 02, 2004 02:08 PM (82jr1)

3 Looks like she's got a much better surgeon though!

Posted by: Jim at February 02, 2004 02:10 PM (IOwam)

4 "How can you end up as a pedophile when you grow up with such awesome boobage around?" Umm... keep it in the family? Incest is best? Think about what you're sayin' Jim... you're creepin me out...

Posted by: Mike the Marine at February 02, 2004 02:20 PM (UJiSP)

5 Then you should stay far away from this post, Mike.

Posted by: Jim at February 02, 2004 02:24 PM (IOwam)

6 This is just what I needed. A post with that Title ought to get googled-up good sending your site meter to about .1 million by, approximately February 18th. yea baby.

Posted by: Shameless Point Whore at February 02, 2004 07:30 PM (E+LQu)

7 Oh WEAK! I hadn't even thought of that! Now I need to stop coming here and driving up your hit count! And Jim.... ewwwww...

Posted by: Mike the Marine at February 02, 2004 10:50 PM (r8Ldc)

8 I wouldn't worry about it. As far as I can tell there hasn't been a single hit from a Janet boob search. Better keywords than mine have to be on half of the blogs out there.

Posted by: Jim at February 03, 2004 01:30 AM (fkewd)

9 yeah but you haven't been re-indexed yet ... right, theres nothing for it. We'll just have to get you google blacklisted

Posted by: Robert at February 03, 2004 06:46 AM (kXZI6)

10 i love boobies

Posted by: bobby at February 05, 2004 10:53 AM (2afNo)

11 I think it's a little family compatition. It's like i can here janet saying to herself "who's in the news now Michael"?

Posted by: Robert Nicks at February 05, 2004 01:43 PM (hGtIE)

12 if the rich bitch wants to show her titties let her, they're hers

Posted by: latricia at February 05, 2004 10:00 PM (Jleb4)

13 I got a hit off 'Janet Jackson Boob' and it was this site, in fact you were the second on the list... so congrats to ya'll

Posted by: Janet Boob search at February 06, 2004 02:23 PM (W8KZw)

14 Wow! I'm the second hit for JJ's knockers? That's freaking cool.

Posted by: Jim at February 06, 2004 02:26 PM (IOwam)

15 it is a tit, in the words of tony the tiger "THATS GRRRRREAT!!!!"

Posted by: Smile Happy at February 06, 2004 08:36 PM (qEjE+)

16 I think this whole thing is stupid. And why the hell is Justin Timberlake not getting any shit about this. He is the one that ripped her blouse! I mean hell, her boob shows and the world freaks...c'mon give me break.

Posted by: Stephanie at February 07, 2004 12:34 PM (geG2Q)

17 Hey i think yall need to lay off i mean it isnt like she really entended for all this stuff to happen i just think yall make a big deal outta nothing

Posted by: amber at February 07, 2004 07:18 PM (YRELu)

18 stephanie, you are blaming Justin? cripey! her outfit had snaps. she had a pasty on. Everybody knew what was happening.

Posted by: MojoMark at February 07, 2004 09:05 PM (FXawF)

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The 'what' I refer to is of course "XSET". I want to know what it means, and so does Rob. He's offering valuable prizes including XSET points(tm) and an all expense paid trip to your own kitchen to the three people with the best explanations for just what the heck XSET is supposed to mean.

I've put in a couple but my brain hurts now and I can't come up with any more. My first inclination was (of course) to let it go at this point and wait to collect my valuable prizes. But, seeing as I'm trying to put up this facade of me as a kind and caring fellow I figured it would go a bit better for that image if I helped out a bit and clued y'all into the contest.

You can submit as many times as you want, your suggestions don't have to be that close to XSET and you have until Feb 22 to enter. Go forth and name that site.

Posted by: Jim at 11:56 AM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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The 9th Bestofme Symphony is up at Unbillable Hours and ready for your weekly perusal. A cuppa, a Symphony, and thou. What more could a blogger ask for?

Hosting: Would you like to host the Symphony? Send me a note.

Submit to the Symphony: Want to be a part of next week's edition? Check out this post for submission help. Entries should always be sent to bestofme@jpeacock.net regardless of who the Symphony host is.

Spread the word: Webloggers, please give TBP some props for a fine Symphony. Maybe a bit of link love would best show our appreciation? (Hint, hint, hint)

Email Reminders: If you'd like to be sent a reminder about the Symphony, drop me a line at this address. It's not a mailing list, just me sending out friendly little reminders. There'll be one on Thursday or Friday to remind you to submit for the next Symphony and one on Monday with the location of the newly posted Symphony.

Posted by: Jim at 08:16 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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