Melissa's been getting worried. I've been so involved in real life that Xibit hasn't had a chance to answer her back and she's been sending mails like there's no tomorrow. Now remember that the last thing we sent her was a mail saying that she needed to send me a picture with people, the car to be pimped and a sign saying "High on SBD". I lost the first two from her during the great mail deletion of 2004. They were pretty unremarkable and both contained a picture of the car without people holding the requisite sign. But she turned it around on the 25th with two identical emails:

From: davidirizarry72@someplace.net

subject: im real

this is me melissa i;m us my brother computer because mine is missed up so here is the picture u whated

The picture that I whated...er...wanted was attached and it was indeed the holy grail of this whole Pimpin' Punk'd theme. A picture of her adorable daughter (and her mens) holding a "High on SBD" sign!

Woo hoo! I rock so much I should require a permit and a variance for the noise ordinances! more...

Posted by: Jim at 02:57 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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I had the opportunity to listen to a bit over a minute of National Peoples Public Radio yesterday morning. The story I caught was a blurb about gas prices. Now if you're like me and you use gasoline you might have noticed that the price of gas has plummeted over the past month and a half or so. Locally we're down a good 40 cents a gallon over that period and they're continuing to fall. NPR's take on this?

Gas prices are an average of 45 cents a gallon more expensive than this time last year.

I can't believe I used to think of them as an impartial news source. Bloody posers. more...

Posted by: Jim at 09:03 AM | Comments (8) | Add Comment
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The 30th Bestofme Symphony is up at XSet. Join Rob for a short but very sweet performance of the very best in the Blogosphere.

Next week's post extravaganza will be hosted by Wetwired.

Hosting: Would you like to host the Symphony? Send me a note and I'll get you on the schedule.

Submit to the Symphony: Want to be a part of next week's edition? Check out this post for submission help. Entries should always be sent to bestofme@jpeacock.net regardless of who the Symphony host is.

Spread the word: Webloggers, how about some linky love? Just think of how happy your readers would be if you gave them a path to such a wonderful reading selection.

Email Reminders: If you'd like to be sent a reminder about the Symphony, join the mailing list. There's one email sent on Thursday or Friday to remind you to submit for the next Symphony and one on Monday with the location of the newly posted Symphony.

Posted by: Jim at 10:15 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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Rawhide!

We took possession Saturday eve and have been moving heavy things since then. The sudden squalls today netted us a wet couch, love seat and mattress. Nice.

I'll most likely not be posting tomorrow. We won't have Internet until the cable guy gets to the new house (goodbye Charter, hello Comcast) and I'll probably be occupied in sweaty man labor regardless.

If I can find the digital camera I'll take some pics for the next entry.

Posted by: Jim at 10:10 PM | Comments (7) | Add Comment
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1 Congratulations on the new house.

Posted by: Kate at June 27, 2004 11:23 PM (FcPaN)

2 Hurry up. No one is commenting at my site.

Posted by: Jennifer at June 28, 2004 02:44 PM (DdBLw)

3 That is exciting... sorry about the couch/love seat/mattresses, but know that rocky beginnings are a sign of good times ahead. I tried to say that in a more clever way but I couldn't and I just made it up but I really hope it is true; that for every difficulty you have with the move, every little problem, you should have ten times the blessings in the years that follow.

Posted by: Rachel Ann at June 28, 2004 02:51 PM (9vaJp)

4 Thanks, y'all. The furniture dried out okay so no damage done there. Doesn't it figure though that the last load last night would have the dresser in the pick-up when another squall hit. I laughed and laughed and laughed. And people say God doesn't have a sense of humor! LOL

Posted by: Jim at June 29, 2004 05:30 AM (bmLWy)

5 Photos + sweaty man-labor = bring it on!!!

Posted by: Claire at June 29, 2004 06:44 PM (l1oyw)

6 Please tell me that you initiated the new pad in the...er...most appropriate way.

Posted by: Helen at June 30, 2004 06:02 AM (jqTFJ)

7 But of course! No pictures yet, though. ;-)

Posted by: Jim at June 30, 2004 07:27 AM (IOwam)

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The vote is in and a survivor has perished. The oddity this week is that the vote was universal - even the departing player voted to die.

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Leahy and Cheney went at it, trading some fairly rude cuts. Cheney lost it and dropped a "fuck" on Leahy. So? This wasn't a speech on the open floor. It was two antagonistic partisans sparring in a private conversation.

Using profanity on the Senate floor while the Senate is [in] session is against the rules. But the Senate was technically not in session at the time and the normal rules did not apply, a Senate official said.

Did you see that up there? I corrected the grammar in a CNN article. I do so totally kick ass. Back to the issue at hand:

Why do they do things like this? Why the "technically" not in session? It was picture day and the Senate was not not in session in any fashion, period and end of story. Why do they have to add in the unnecessary qualifier of "technically"? It's so the reader will think that Cheney is taking advantage of a loophole to escape his just punishment for his potty mouth.

In response to Cheney, Leahy reminded Cheney that the vice president had once accused him of being a bad Catholic, to which Cheney replied either "f--- off" or "go f--- yourself."

All of this hullabaloo over a profanity and nobody even knows which profanity was used? Color me unimpressed. Leahy was interviewed about it and they didn't ask him what the profanity was? Rightsuretheydidn't. Leahy doesn't remember what Cheney said because they were in the midst of an argument and the profanity didn't register. Pat's got to be pretty used to people telling him to fuck off, fuck himself, stick things in his fucking ass, etc.

No, what happened is that somebody close enough to eavesdrop heard part of a profanity. When Cheney and Leahy were done he went up to Leahy and said something like "Pat, did he just tell you to go fuck yourself?" and Leahy responded with something like "Fuck off, go fuck myself, yeah - something like that. Why?" Then the eavesdropper said "Do you know that profanity is against the rules of the Senate?" and Pat said "Fuckin A? Son of a bitch that's fucking awesome! We got that cocksucker now!"

But when they went to rat on Cheney they were told that the profanity rule (like all of the rules of order) is only in effect when the Senate is in session and today was picture day and the Senate was not in session. No crime, no foul. So Leahy probably dropped it with a little moue on his face but the eavesdropper decided he'd give it to the press and let them run with it.

I pledge that when I am Vice President I will refrain from ever using profanity on the floor of the Senate, whether it's in session or not, unless the brainless mother fuckers totally deserve it or I'm really angry. In either of those cases all bets are off.

Posted by: Jim at 03:08 PM | Comments (11) | Add Comment
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I just deleted (permanently) about 20 emails that I needed to follow up on. Every morning I eradicate my overnight spam with extreme prejudice. This morning I highlighted all of the messages in the folder just like I do every day, held down the "shift" key and pressed "delete". When the happy little pop-up popped up and asked "Jim, are you absolutely sure that you want to delete these emails in a frightfully permanent, never to be undone manner? I mean - you will never, EVER see these again and that's no joke Homey. OK or Cancel?" I hit "OK" like I do every day. Imagine my perplexity when all of the emails in the folder disappeared but the number next to the "Junk" folder in my Outlook bar stayed exactly the same. Follow along with my thought processes:

that's weird...what just happened there...something wrong with the Outlook bar...did I just go through the delete sequence or am I so sleepy that I messed it up...mmmm coffee...folder's definitely empty so why does it still say there are unread messages...weird shit...oh, wait...when I click on the folder it's full again...was I even on that folder...where was I...what did I delete...sonofabitchshitdammitarghhhhh!!!

Damn. There were emails from Melissa (the car Pimpress) and some new Pimp Dogg in there. I think I can fake it responding to those though. At least 3 or 4 leads for Zero Intelligence just bit it and that hurts. Good leads aren't as easy to come by now with summer break in session. There were two for Memeblog; hope Simon will catch those. Oddly enough there were some work related ones too. How did those get in there...

If you mailed me and were waiting for a response please mail me again.

On the plus side, my Inbox hasn't been this clean in three and a half years!

Posted by: Jim at 07:50 AM | Comments (8) | Add Comment
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I'm pacing myself sergeant!

Okay, okay. So these links are a little late. It's not that I've been putting off posting on them, it's that I just about totally forgot about them. Anyway...

I won a caption contest at Electric Venom! Sweet! Hey, Kate? Where's my prize?

Pixy Misa posted a foolproof Guide to Detecting Journalistic Bias. I've tried it numerous times over the past week and it's worked 100% of the time. Spooky. His Magic, Part 1 post is super-fine also.

BigWig talks about sex and sexuality and just what a sexy man is. Long story short, it's me. Well, according to me it is.

I had a couple more but they've been lost to inadverdent deletions. Never use your news aggregator as a storage medium. Instead of those I offer this modern foil at Bloviating Inanities: Haikuenheit 911. Yeah, nothing beats haikus about Fat Bastard lying shill inhumane propagandist Michael Moore.

UPDATE: I found one of 'em! I had actually emailed it to myself so as not to lose it. That's some bright thinking on my part. I deserve serious kudos for thinking of that. The link that's lost no longer was to Ace's fantastic ripping of the blatantly lying press over ties between Iraq and Al-Quaeda.

Posted by: Jim at 03:32 PM | Comments (6) | Add Comment
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It's time to impart some of the pearls of wisdom we've acquired up to this point.

Get the paperwork requirements early. Late last week after we had signed our agreements and everything was set between us and the sellers we got a package from our broker. (A broker can be of great help in acquiring a loan at an excellent rate, helping to get you through special purchase requirements like HUD, FHA and VA and otherwise make the money side of house buying much easier.) The package from the broker had a stack of forms to fill out and sign and a list of papers and receipts we needed to provide within 24 hours. WTF? Granted some of these could not have been completed until after the purchase agreement was signed but the vast majority could have been gathered and/or filled out at any time if we'd known about it. Turns out this is a standard thing in the industry because brokers don't want to spend money on your paperwork if you aren't committed (in writing) to a house. They only make money if you get a mortgage. Insist on the list right away because you'll pull out hair trying to gather everything at the last minute.

Keep off of the bank account. My Mom wanted to help us by paying for our inspection and she also wanted us to get some nice housewarming things. She sent a check. We deposited it. BIIIIIIG mistake. You see, if there are any unexpected deposits or withdrawals the lender wants to know what they're for. They want you to PROVE what they were for. They need to know that you didn't just incur an additional debt or that you aren't paying on an undisclosed debt. This is a hassle, especially when you find out that it is needed on Friday evening and the closing is on Tuesday. And the check was a gift from your out of state Mom. And because it was from her credit union account and they have barely mastered paper processing and are terribly frightened of any terms starting with an "e-" so there's absolutely no way to get a copy of the canceled check. You end up having to forge your mother's signature on an affidavit saying that the check was a gift but take the time to write her name out a hundred times or so in order to get a smooth flow since you haven't had to forge it since you were in Junior High.

Ask for the world, their draperies and their pets. House Lady was really good here. She asked for absolutely everything we could think of and added some things we didn't think of. When you put that offer in the only way it can go is down. If you don't have things that can be cut off of it then you are not going to get some of the things that you really want/need. Plus if they're desperate enough you just might get their pets.

Don't ever think of skimping on an inspector and get a good one. Another place House Lady came through for us was hooking us up with an excellent inspector. Earl knew his shit and based on his inspection we had a long dozen things (actually it was a dozenty-three things) that we wanted repaired. Similar to the point above we asked for everything to be fixed, even stuff we really didn't care about. They gave us everything. He shoots, he scores! (There was an issue with one fix - a 30 amp fuse that didn't get placed but that was ultimately by my choice.)

Posted by: Jim at 01:45 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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The deed is done! Or, more precisely, the deed has been transferred and then put in hock for the next 30 years. Either way we're now homeowners.

Damn, what a relief it is. The paperwork crunch over the past several days (including last night at 8 PM) has almost driven me to drink. But all that's over now and all that's left is the move.

We had a celebration dinner and our first stop at Home Depot to buy things for the house - fire ant treatment and plant killer. No fire ants now and we want to keep it that way. The plant killer is for the poison ivy in the back yard. It's not bad (just two plants) but I want that stuff dead in a very final manner. We also bought wall anchors and hooks 'cause you can never have too many things on the walls.

Right now I'm debating whether to open the bottle of champagne that the lawyer gave me at the closing. I'm sorely tempted but I think we'll save that for our first night in the new place.

Everybody should be planning on being in the Atlanta area some time in the early middle of July for our breaking-in celebration. I'll let you know when we get the date set. :-)

Posted by: Jim at 06:47 PM | Comments (10) | Add Comment
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In approximately an hour and a half my Lovely Wife will be picking me up from work. We'll go home and have some lunch. I'll then travel to a lawyer's office where I will sign my name for close to an hour straight. At approximately 3:30 PM I will be a home owner.

I am so freaking totally butterflies and needles right now.

Hot damn!

Posted by: Jim at 10:42 AM | Comments (7) | Add Comment
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It's the last day for the 1st Annual Simon's Desperate Enough Willing To Buy Readers Charity Drive. The winner has been selected but there's still time left to drive up Simon's donation. Just get over to his site and do your part to raise his average hit count. Any increase in this last day will get a HK$4 donation instead of a HK$2 donation (about fifty cents instead of 25 cents).

Oh yeah - you should read some of his stuff too. He's pretty good.

Posted by: Jim at 09:52 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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The insane Arab fundamentalists have murdered South Korean citizen Kim Sun-il. Kim was one more foreign national working to make Iraq a better place.

Words have no wings but they can fly a thousand miles.

That's a very old Korean saying and it's very true but in this case I need these words to travel quite a few thousand miles as I wish peace of heart and deep sympathy for Kim Sun-il's family and loved ones.

The three thousand South Korean troops that were scheduled to ship to Iraq are still coming. Now they have one more reason to do so. Good hunting, gentlemen.

Posted by: Jim at 09:17 AM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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Dana of Note-It Posts has dropped 8 pounds and 15 ounces. Proud papa has the details over here. (It's guy safe - no gross stuff you need a medical degree or a uterus to read without flinching).

Posted by: Jim at 09:00 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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(Hat tip to Dopple-G)

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So I mentioned previously that I'd had a genuine epiphany. It occurred during a deep dark exploration of the soul, some time between going to bed and falling to sleep a couple of hours later. See I was having trouble falling asleep and I started thinking about the jobs I've held over the past twenty plus years. Yeah, twenty plus. My very first real job was as a dishwasher in a bakery when I was 14. Even before that I had paper routes.

In twenty plus years of working I've had jobs I've liked and jobs I haven't liked. Most of them were in the first category as I'm fairly easy to please but also had no compunction about leaving a place if I didn't like it. Those two qualities together kept the bad jobs to a minimum. Now on the jobs that I liked I found a certain constant that encompassed my absolute favorite times on those jobs. The duty or responsibility or task that made me the happiest was the same whether I was working as a cart pusher, meat cutter, arcade attendant, cashier, surgical tech, what have you. I always got the most satisfaction and enjoyment out of a job when I was teaching somebody else.

I love teaching. That's my epiphany. Okay, so it's not a world-shaking event. I don't know if I can even use that. See, I'm not qualified to be hired as a teacher. Even in the things that I know at an elemental level I don't have a piece of paper that says "This guy can teach that". Not only that but the salary for teachers is somewhat low compared to what I need to support my family.

So I probably will not be pursuing a teaching position now as there's no realistic chance of realizing the goal. I will, however, be keeping my eyes out for opportunities to get those pieces of paper and to incorporate teaching in the jobs that I get.

Some day I may be able to do what I really want. For now I'll busy myself getting ready.

Posted by: Jim at 01:09 PM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
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As you can probably imagine, getting ready to move into our first house has kept the finances tight. As a result I wasn't expecting any Daddy's Day prizes. My Lovely Wife is not one to be put off by something so simple as lack of cash though.

I ended up with a big-ass Coleman propane grill with side burner, 2 magnolia seedlings and a 2-stroke gas powered weed whacker. I was also in temporary custody of a stuffed shark, a marble, a Barney car and a bag of rubber balls. The little people reclaimed the smaller gift items throughout the day.

How'd she finagle such largess? She found this group called FreeCycle that connects people who don't need stuff anymore with people who could use it. Very, very sweet. I need a fuel line for the whacker but that's no big deal. The grill needs a propane tank but our broker (may the angels smile upon him) is donating one of his extras.

Is my Lovely Wife awesome or what?

Posted by: Jim at 11:38 AM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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My eyes are giving me a headache. Let me expound - I've had a headache for a few days (obviously stress related from the house and the job) but since yesterday it's been getting worse with light. Bright light builds up the pain to unbearable levels and no drug I have access to can touch it.

So I've been sitting here in my brightly lit cube with my brightly lit monitor feeling the shearing grip of pain extend through my head like a tentacled horror burrowing through my skull. All of a sudden I had a V-8 moment. You know - when you slap yourself for not thinking of something so obvious as to be ridiculous? Yeah, one of those moments.

I've turned off the lights in my cube and reduced the monitor brightness to "way low". The overhead lights provide plenty of light for anything except novel reading and since I don't have any excellent works of fiction here that's quite sufficient. With the monitor turned down low it's actually almost soporific to gaze upon.

Ah...feel the fingers of bright shiny pain receding...

Posted by: Jim at 11:27 AM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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Immunity Challenge III is up for voting at Survivor: Blogosphere Edition.

I can't decide which to vote for - they're all really good.

Posted by: Jim at 08:34 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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Simon has started a new blog to help showcase new blogs. Sound confusing? It's not nearly so difficult as my description makes it sound.

Basically it allows new blogs (under 3 months old) to submit a post that will be presented for anybody to read. It'll give us established folk a place to keep an eye out for the new talent the way NZ Bear's New Blog Showcase contest used to.

You can read about the particulars here.

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