Pixy thinks it was spammers.

I have a different theory.

Posted by: Jim at 06:46 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
Post contains 12 words, total size 1 kb.

Me: Is "ballsacks" one word or two?

Coworker: Just one.

Me: Are you sure? Spellcheck says it's two.

Coworker: Try spellchecking "spellcheck".

[Pause]

Me: Oh. I see.

Coworker: Yeah. If the damn thing can't even recognize it's own name you can be pretty sure it's clueless about ballsacks.

Posted by: Jim at 08:44 AM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
Post contains 55 words, total size 1 kb.

Three weeks of the most intense development imaginable. Two separate groups of subject matter experts flown in. Two UI developers, 2 DBAs and 4 contractors working hell shifts and weekends for 10 days. Three completely new component systems learned and implemented. Four new technologies developed. A last minute 100% setback. A brief reprieve. And then...

The demo was a smashing success.

The top 20 officers in the company saw just what our developers can do when given their heads and qualified direction. There was oohing and aahing. There were exclamations at the speed of our product (504 page reports off a 17 million record set live database in under 4 seconds).

They did not approve our proof of concept for development. Although we met every reporting requirement we were tasked with we failed to meet the invisible requirements of matching the back-office capability of the very expensive preferred vendor. That capability took a score of hungry Romanians two years to develop so there's no way we could do it inside the 6 month implementation deadline. 7 months, maybe - they're only Romanians after all.

But all is not lost. Enterprise Development got to show off big time for the biggest brass in the company. Many of the tech advances and components from the proof of concept will get used in other applications. Our street cred is huge now. Our collective ballsacks are silky smooth and engorged with massive testosterone loads ready to fire at the slightest provocation.

We kicked serious ass.

Posted by: Jim at 08:37 AM | Comments (9) | Add Comment
Post contains 265 words, total size 2 kb.

Last week my wife forgot to turn her cell phone off and the damned thing started ringing about 4:00 AM. I got up, turned it off and went back to sleep. It could only be a wrong number.

I forgot all about until the next day when my wife insisted that I listen to two messages left by the caller. She was giddy with excitement. She hit the switch and then came the voice. It was a woman who sounded exactly like Wanda Sykes, except it was no joke. Regardless, it was arguably the funniest thing IÂ’ve ever heard. She was pissed and it went like this:

“I don’t know where you is, but I hope it was worth it. I’m tired of y’all leaving them kids with any mother-fuckin-body who’ll take them. You left the door to my house unlocked and somebody coulda’ come and steal my kids. I don’t know how many niggers you fuckin, but I seen that last bitch. And now you done gone too far. Now Curly-Pop is gonna find you and bust yo ass!”

Did I mention she was pissed?

I canÂ’t reproduce it accurately with words, and thatÂ’s where I need your help. If someone could tell me how to capture it into a file, youÂ’ll be treated to the real thing. IÂ’ve listened to these messages at least ten times and IÂ’m here to tell you, itÂ’s funny shit. Shit you just canÂ’t make up. So how do I save and post these gems?

I should mention that the actual calls are somewhat longer and a lot more profane.

Posted by: Pixy Misa at 07:45 AM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
Post contains 275 words, total size 2 kb.

Wedding invitations are by far the most infuriating waste of money on the face of this Earth. They're like hundreds and hundreds of dollars!

The entire design is completely retarded. Firstly, you put the invitation in an envelope right. Then, you put this thingie into another envelope, along with this stupid card and another fricken envelope! What the hell people?

I mean, when I was a kid the local skating rink used to host birthday parties. If you had your party there, the rink would send these little postcard invites to all your little crumb-snatching, rugrat friends. It doesn't really take three fucking envelopes and three sheets of paper to invite someone to a shindig am I right? Or email. Why can't we just send a mass email to everyone, and have them RSVP?

Well, apparently women are insane. Did you know when they're little girls they starts planning and thinking about their wedding? Like how they want it to be and all that? Okay, show of hands, how many of the men here ever thought about what kind of cake they wanted at their wedding say, more than a year before they got married? Yeah, that's what I thought. I mean, I don't even know what I'm going to wear each day until I get up, and the women are planning this wedding thing like decades in advance. The only thing I've ever planned more than a year in advance was a car loan or a mortgage. And I only did that because I had to.

So in the end, I've concluded what every married man already knew: You can't fight 'em on anything. A logical appeal doesn't register when they've spent years living their wedding day in their minds, yapping it up with other women about how they're getting married. It's like a fucking cult man; and my fiancee is only a fraction of the freak that some of these other women are. I agree with her, and count my blessings that she's not completely lost her mind.

Posted by: Id at 05:23 PM | Comments (7) | Add Comment
Post contains 342 words, total size 2 kb.

First thingÂ’s first. I added De to the main blogroll, because anybody who writes a post containing the line, "When i'm masturbating the only time i can come is if i have a lint brush stuck in my ass" certainly deserves to be there.

Posted by: Pixy Misa at 09:02 AM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
Post contains 48 words, total size 1 kb.

1 First things first... Let it be known that I am not the one that masturbates with a lint brush. I actually buy sex toys that are sex toys. LOL Secondly: OH MY GOD! I'm so glad you're back, Paul! It's a good day is the blogosphere!

Posted by: De at August 22, 2005 04:04 PM (IdVP4)

Hide Comments | Add Comment

Hi. My name is Paul. You might remember me from a blog called SanityÂ’s-Edge.

IÂ’ve decided to come out of retirement. My loathing of the masses in general is fairly unhealthy and needs an outlet. IÂ’ve also noticed a lack of quality blogging lately. WhatÂ’s happened to the scorn and disgust in the blogosphere? Wherever I look I see cats and quizzes. And thatÂ’s not fucking good enough. WhereÂ’s the humiliation? The honesty? The name calling?

I remember a blogosphere full of heroes, unafraid to write about shitting themselves in public. Honest folks who questioned the wisdom of conventional blogging and resorted to cheap tricks to get traffic. People like this butt-nut, whoÂ’s every embarrassing bodily function became not only public knowledge, but a source of material for every wiseass with a blog.

IÂ’ve decided to park my ass here because I like the man. He doesnÂ’t pull any punches. I do regret, however, not checking the site meter before I signed the contract. WeÂ’ll have to do something about that. Ever noticed how somebody elseÂ’s house always looks good until you move and see all the flaws? You know, clean enough at first glance, but after you spend a few nights there you realize they never cleaned the baseboards or dusted the top of the fridge? What this place needs is a fresh coat of paint and some fucking blogroll tweaking. WeÂ’ll get to that soon enough, but first IÂ’ve got a backlog of posts and some name calling to do.

Welcome me the fuck back.

Posted by: Pixy Misa at 08:19 AM | Comments (15) | Add Comment
Post contains 263 words, total size 2 kb.

1 Ladies and gentlemen, the one and only, Paul. And in defense of my seemingly shitty stats, mind you that sitemeter's only a few months old, and it doesn't reflect the fact that I ditched my old site without telling very many people where I was moving to. It also doesn't account for taste, the lowbrow bastard.

Posted by: shank at August 22, 2005 09:28 AM (+H1yK)

2 Well, I've never posted anything about a cat except this: http://rocketjones.mu.nu/archives/011480.php Other than that, I'm an upbeat guy. So with a big ol' smile, I say: Fuck you. 'sides, I'd rather leave my trashy shit in other people's comments, it keeps the ol' home base clean don'tcha know.

Posted by: Ted at August 22, 2005 09:58 AM (blNMI)

3 Welcome the FUCK back, Paul! I would talk about shitting myself but I won't get an asshole til I get married....OUCH!

Posted by: De at August 22, 2005 04:08 PM (IdVP4)

4 And my heart goes... flutter, flutter. Happy to see your return!

Posted by: Jackie at August 22, 2005 08:57 PM (eHSsi)

5 Well well well look what the shank dragged in. Shitterously though, welcome back man. I would have had you join my blog but ... you now.. and the .. yeah.. those things. um. Welcome back.

Posted by: Oorgo at August 23, 2005 03:58 AM (1JIkb)

6 It's good to be back! Thanks, all.

Posted by: Paul at August 23, 2005 07:49 AM (vbP6L)

7 Paul's back one day and Munuviana crashes. Coincidence? I think not.

Posted by: Jim at August 23, 2005 06:45 PM (oqu5j)

8 Actually, I told Paul I had some grade A pr0n laying around, but the directory was too big to email. So I uploaded it all onto our site, and he tried to dowload it all at once. The greedy, sticky-palmed wacko.

Posted by: shank at August 23, 2005 07:48 PM (jfEhX)

9 Who are you?

Posted by: Victor at August 24, 2005 02:30 PM (L3qPK)

10 Welcome the fuck back, Jack! Er. . .Paul. I expect to see some humiliation and some name-calling by 9:00 p.m. every day. Yeah, I know. I meant on this blog. Let's leave my house outta this.

Posted by: Margi at August 24, 2005 02:59 PM (nwEQH)

11 Thank God someone has brought back vile, vindictiveness and vice back to blogging. Shame it has to be Paul that does it.

Posted by: Simon at August 24, 2005 05:15 PM (cxbPQ)

12 Who the heck gave Paul a blog? Oh... Yeah. Hey, welcome back!

Posted by: Pixy Misa at August 25, 2005 01:19 AM (RbYVY)

13 I'm gettin the warm fuzzies. Unfortunately, I suppose I'm expected to actually produce something...

Posted by: Paul at August 25, 2005 08:04 AM (vbP6L)

14 Well hell. Here I thought we were SUPPOSED to be all "touchy-feely" and P.C. in our blogging. Who knew?! Guess I better start getting my act together.

Posted by: Koolaid at August 25, 2005 01:11 PM (nwEQH)

15 I just want to put a note on this. Paul seems to be missed, but why? Everyone has shit themselves. We were all babies at some point so yes, we shit ourselves. What is so special about that? In the 2nd paragraph of your return, you write about heroes talk about shitting themselves I ask you..who hasn't shit themselves in public?

Posted by: Firstfreak at August 28, 2005 12:23 AM (ApN8O)

Hide Comments | Add Comment

So the weather was gorgeous today. Highs in the mid nineties, sunny, a nice 2 to 3 foot easterly swell rolling in. So I blast out of work. I push a racing line through the parking lot, damn near taking a few slowpokes out at the knees. I blaze home taking corners at 30 or 40 mph, checking blindspots, working the clutch like a one-legged man on a unicycle. I slide up into the driveway, haul ass into the house and start changing clothes. I don't even get into my bathing suit and rash guard before the floodgates open. It's friggin pouring.

That's the thing about the southeast coast in the summer time. The air gets so humid, that if it didn't rain before 4:30 everyday we'd rowing home in rush hour instead of driving. It's that damn humid.

The good thing is that usually these storms blow over in about thirty minutes, and then I can hit the beach. I just fucking hate waiting.

Posted by: Id at 04:40 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
Post contains 175 words, total size 1 kb.

Since my post about Deliverance went over so well, I thought I'd try to do a series of posts about the male-rape-by-hillbilly outre of movies. I thought you all might enjoy it, plus it would certainly boost the gayness rating of Jim's blog.

Folks, don't ever google the phrase "man rape movies." Just trust me on this one.

Posted by: Victor at 06:15 PM | Comments (14) | Add Comment
Post contains 64 words, total size 1 kb.

I'd originally posted this on my blog and since I'm sure Jim's legions of fans are itching for a post, much like heroin addicts waiting for their next boost of smack, I figured I'd share.

I was recently discussing dentist appointments with the guys at work one of them mentioned he'd rather have his nads waxed than go to the dentist. Dentist visits donÂ’t bother me, maybe itÂ’s that my dentist is an attractive lady or that most of her assistants have always been attractive women.

I'd defiantly take a trip to visit them over a nad waxing, especially after catching a couple of stray hairs in my zipper this morning.

Posted by: phin at 02:20 PM | Comments (5) | Add Comment
Post contains 115 words, total size 1 kb.

Just when I say I'm on hiatus, I make a post. Behold the dichotomy of Jim.

I give you...Xtreme Paper Disposal:

By the way, I got me a new mini-digital.

Posted by: Jim at 09:07 PM | Comments (1) | Add Comment
Post contains 36 words, total size 1 kb.

I haven't been posting much. The rather massive project I previously mentioned (the one that went nuclear) is demanding seriously large chuncks of my free time. Enough chunks where I've fallen behind on my blogreading by about 300 posts and haven't put out anything worthwhile here since my promotion came through.

So let's make it official - I'm on blog hiatus until things calm down and I get some of my free time back. For those of you who are calendar oriented that will be Aug 23 at the earliest (as the presentation to senior management is Aug 22).

In the meantime, anybody who has author rights here (hello, Snooze Crew&trade is encouraged to post. It's a shame to let this prime real estate lie fallow.

And I'll leave you with this little gem:

Burger: Girls don't have penises.

Lovely Wife: That's true. What do they have instead?

Burger: Belly buttons!

Posted by: Jim at 05:54 AM | Comments (11) | Add Comment
Post contains 159 words, total size 1 kb.

1 My son finished 4th grade last May and during the last week of school that had some kind of a basic "sex-ed/health/make sure you wash your hands after you go to the bathroom" class. "The Wife" said you may want to talk to "H" too see if he has any questions. OK, hey "H" what did you learn about this last week? We learned that boys had penises and that girls had "Virginias". Virginias, I quickly ran back and told the wife it's all good.

Posted by: Frick at August 15, 2005 09:01 AM (Zw2NB)

2 good lord.

Posted by: pylorns at August 15, 2005 10:11 AM (FTYER)

3 Hopefully, Burger will learn different sometime. Not necesarilly *soon* but sometime.

Posted by: Victor at August 15, 2005 10:17 AM (L3qPK)

4 Yesterday he caught me again on the toilet.He said "are you peeing?" and I said YES.He goes "out of WHAT?Your butt?? Oh no!Your belly button!!!!!"Me....NO......he "OK,I am going to tell on you!!!Brotherrrrrrrrrrrrsssssssss!!!!!Mama is peeing out of her belly button!" It was also recently inquired if he may or may not be allowed to lick my boobs,followed by walking up to two of my friends and asking them where their boobs are......That kid's a PERVERT!!!!!

Posted by: LW at August 15, 2005 10:39 AM (oqu5j)

5 Could that possibly have anything to do with his father?

Posted by: diamond dave at August 15, 2005 04:19 PM (gkwrQ)

6 Double D, you sayin' Jim has an innie?

Posted by: Victor at August 15, 2005 08:12 PM (l+W8Z)

7 I wouldn't know that, but it seems that Jim's apples don't fall far from the tree...

Posted by: diamond dave at August 15, 2005 09:01 PM (zxjPs)

8 By apple do you mean undescended testicle? 'cause if you do thatÂ’s just mean.

Posted by: phin at August 15, 2005 09:43 PM (DGPlf)

9 Okay, I give up.

Posted by: diamond dave at August 15, 2005 11:16 PM (kt/ag)

10 i hate when you suck. ;-) :-P

Posted by: Pam at August 15, 2005 11:47 PM (PfGjA)

11 I'll have you know that all of my testicles are fully extended. I mean descended. My boys hang low.

Posted by: Jim at August 16, 2005 05:23 AM (oqu5j)

Hide Comments | Add Comment

Victor here, taking up the slack in Jim's blog while ignoring my own. Since it seems no one got the last stealth point (except for me) I thought I'd give you a quick summary of the Academy Award-nominated movie Deliverance, as remembered through a twenty+ year-old filter:

Ok. These four city guys go on a canoe trip down a river in Georgia or Alabama or West Virginia--someplace where there's a lot of hillbillies. One dude meets this weird-looking kid with a banjo so he pulls out his guitar and they play Dueling Banjos. Then the four guys go down the river some more, but they stop because Ned Beatty has to take a dump or something.

Ned is accosted by these two hillbillies (who, between the both of them, have about three teeth) who force him to undress, then they rape him while making him squeal like a pig. Then the four guys decide to hunt down the rapists. I remember one of them was using a bow and arrow, and I think one of them died, but that's about it. The End.

If you want the full, correct story, it might be best if you just bought it.

Posted by: Victor at 09:37 PM | Comments (7) | Add Comment
Post contains 211 words, total size 2 kb.

Bane rhymes with insane (and rightly so it seems) which is why he's getting a link here. Well okay, he's funny and crazy and cunningly sharp, like the serrated edge of a survival knife, but scarier.

Posted by: Id at 07:51 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
Post contains 38 words, total size 1 kb.

Okay, I don't usually wash my hands after taking a leak. Mostly because I don't piss on them, but also because it's not like I'm going straight from the urinal tothe kitchen sounter to knead some dough. Anyways, I was just in the bathroom a few minutes ago, and there was another guy in there. We both finished about the same time, and he went for the sink to wash his hands. I didn't want him tot hink I was some kind of germy bastard, so I washed my hands too. He leaves, I get up to the sink and being rinsing and lathering my hands. Well, the sink in the bathroom is one of those gooseneck ones typically seen in a hospital setting. The water comes out in a definied stream. It hits my hands and I just get water all over the front of my pants. I mean, I'm looking down at my crotch laughing, becuase I have no other option. There's water droplets from my fly all the was to about mid calve, I look like I didn't even bother to unbutton my pants at the urinal. SO I grab some paper towels and I'm furiously rubbing away at my pants, hoping to get some of the water out. I'm terrified someone's going to walk in, so I figure it's well enough camoflauged after a few minutes, and head back tot eh office. I round the corner and look at the last 25 feet to my door. no one. Sweet. I walk briskly down the hall, just knowing that Dan or someone is going to catch me with piss all over my pants, I hit the doornob and don't even stop moving.

Which is why I walked square into Josie, one of the managers who was coming out of the doorway, causing her to literally throw her coffee in the air; creating this Barrettesque coffee rainstorm. At least I don't look like I pissed my pants anymore.

Posted by: Id at 05:39 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
Post contains 336 words, total size 2 kb.

One 4th generation Prelude, 4-wheel steering, I/H/E, JDM H22A engine, JDM tranny, many many extras. Only rolled once. $3,000 obo.

Met with some fellow Preluders this weekend and drove up into the NC mountains to drive a section of road known as the Tail of the Dragon. 11 miles, 318 turns, 1,000 feet of elevation change. It is by all accounts the penultimate driver's challenge available outside a race track.

As my buddy David here shows us, it is also the perfect spot to attempt difficult manuevers like the midair double barrel roll. Because of the lack of experience and care of some of the drivers that were with us, the car that Dave's put countless hours and dollars into is reduced to a pile of very nice, expensive car parts.

The other guy? Well, he was only worse because he didn't have any insurance at all. But because of some extenuating circumstances, the person who actually caused this wreck did not for some reason get a ticket. I'm not sure how he slipped through. If I hadn't been so happy that I didn't have to pick up David's various body parts and take them home to his momma in a fuckin' Hefty cinch sack, I would've jumped so far down his throat my Nike's would be sticking out his ass. As for the guy without insurance, Dave said the statey that handed out the tickets was chewing him out so bad his little brown statey hat almost shook off his little bald statey head. Cause an accident and you have no auto insurance. That's a whole 'nother entry.

Posted by: Id at 07:34 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
Post contains 273 words, total size 2 kb.

Well, usually she does. Right now she's not feeling too happy about it.

In brief, Venomous Kate and her Venomous Hubby pinched the pocketbook to get her teeth fixed. Mere days before she was to receive her new pearly whites she had a bike accident and knocked out about half a score of teeth. She's now the proud owner of 6 grand worth of dental appliances that can't be used because of the new tooth loss and eight grand away from fixing the new mouthal problems.

This is very sad. When Kate smiles the blogosphere is a brighter place. If you'd like to help restore Electric Venom's bite just head on over to the Fang Fund.

Posted by: Jim at 04:00 PM | Comments (4) | Add Comment
Post contains 134 words, total size 1 kb.

I just got a trackback spam for "oral sex for women". What the hell is that?

Tuesday through Friday were all-day meetings at work. Every day. The whole day.

On Tuesday I went out for some celebration drinks after work. It was much fun but I payed the price on Wednesday. If Lovely Wife hadn't woken me up I would have missed the beginning of the Wednesday meeting.

There's a decent chance that if she hadn't woken me up I would have missed a significant portion of that meeting.

Wednesday's meeting was 11 hours and then dinner afterward.

I worked from home until 2:30 today to catch up some of the critical stuff I missed while I was in the critical all day meetings.

I'm wrecked and once again 150 odd posts behind in my blog reading.

The celebration drinks on Tuesday were because I officially got my Project Manager title on Monday. Yay!

We have three dogs now. We got a new lab/Aussie mutt puppy a couple of weeks ago. Pictures soon, I promise.

We have 8 cats now. Stitch, slut that she is, went into heat some time after we pulled out of the driveway for our Spokane trip. She spit out the bebe kats a week and a half ago.

I still have Morrigan's microwave plate.

I'm now three of the top application development projects at work.

And will be adding another next week.

One of those three became an emergency last week - this accounts for two of the four meeting days this week. And two more next week. [sigh]

Three of the five kittens have adoption promises already. All to women who work at the same office.

One of their clients is one of our biggest clients. Small world.

We may be boarding another lab for one of the folks who's taking a kitten.

I'm not sure that trading a kitten for an adult dog gets us out ahead anywhere, pet-wise.

Both of my parents tried to call me on my birthday. They called at home. While I was at work. This bummed me out severely.

I got my favorite selection of tasty beers for one of my birthday presents. This cheered me up considerably.

Lovely Wife rocks.

At the dinner on Wednesday I had enough prime beef to compact a tiger's colon.

There's something oddly satisfying about letting loose a $40 beef shit.

Posted by: Jim at 07:52 PM | Comments (7) | Add Comment
Post contains 406 words, total size 2 kb.

I'm old. As evidence I present this conversational snippet from Monday:

Bear: Do you know what tomorrow is?

Me: What's tomorrow?

Bear: Tuesday!

Me: Yeah, the chances are high that tomorrow will be a Tuesday.

Bear: Do you know what else is tomorrow?

Me: The day before Wednesday?

Bear: Your birthday!

Me: It is? Are you sure?

Bear: Yeah!!

Me: How about that... Hey, how old will I be?

Bear: Real old. Sixty-three.

Me: Sixty...three...??

Bear: I meant thirty-six! It just looks almost the same as sixty-three!

So there you have it out of the mouths of babes. Or at least out of the mouth of a cheeky six year-old. I'm just hoping that "it" was the numerals and not my aging carcass.

Hmmm...I'd better be careful around the homestead. I can now be legally exchanged for two eighteen year-olds...

Posted by: Jim at 05:32 AM | Comments (20) | Add Comment
Post contains 144 words, total size 1 kb.

1 Happy Birthday Jim! Don't worry Jim she won't trade you in, old age and treachery win out over youth and enthusiasm every time. Especially with the creation of "the little blue pill".

Posted by: phin at August 03, 2005 05:51 AM (DGPlf)

2 Happy Birthday! You youngster!

Posted by: vw bug at August 03, 2005 06:38 AM (dkZJv)

3 Happy Belated Birthday!

Posted by: Machelle at August 03, 2005 09:06 AM (ZAyoW)

4 Happy Birthday!!!! I'll have a shot in your honor!

Posted by: Tiffani at August 03, 2005 09:31 AM (KE4Gu)

5 Have a wonderful birthday!

Posted by: kitty at August 03, 2005 11:31 AM (uFhgB)

6 Happy Birthday, Jim. Geez, all these late July/early August birthdays. Sounds like your parents had a fun Thanksgiving... ;-)

Posted by: Bou at August 03, 2005 02:23 PM (5JHEt)

7 How mean! I give everyone plenty of notice before my birthday for gift getting... Now, all you get is my sincerest HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!

Posted by: DeAnna at August 03, 2005 02:56 PM (IdVP4)

8 Happy belated birthday. No matter how old I get, you'll always be 5 years older. I like that in a person.

Posted by: Jennifer at August 03, 2005 03:43 PM (FfRxo)

9 My very best belated happy birthday wishes! When you coming to NY so we can drink to your birthday?

Posted by: RP at August 03, 2005 03:45 PM (LlPKh)

10 Never,NY is just not on the list anymore unless its Niagara Falls.LOL

Posted by: LW at August 03, 2005 05:16 PM (oqu5j)

11 I'm late in saying it publicly, but on the day? I was early. Happy birthday, babes

Posted by: Helen at August 03, 2005 05:37 PM (ATx6T)

12 Happy Birthday, old man!

Posted by: Pam at August 03, 2005 05:38 PM (zelz2)

13 Happy birthday, Jim. But come on, what would LW want with 2 18year olds? She already has you trained and with two it'd be like puppies, the hedaches are exponential, not additive. Nah, don't worry something like that until you're at least 50. :-D

Posted by: tommy at August 03, 2005 08:51 PM (OJ+GI)

14 Happy Belated Jim.

Posted by: Denise at August 04, 2005 06:27 AM (JTlEe)

15 happy bday! although a day late and a dollar short...

Posted by: pylorns at August 04, 2005 08:22 AM (FTYER)

16 Happy Birthday... late... again... as usual.

Posted by: Contagion at August 04, 2005 08:34 AM (Q5WxB)

17 Did you get Bubbleman for your birthday? Happy B-Day Jim!

Posted by: Morrigan at August 04, 2005 10:39 PM (Qwj4T)

18 Thanks, y'all! Mo - No Bubbleman for me but I did get a selection of very tasty beers. I can make my own bubbles with that. ;-)

Posted by: Jim at August 05, 2005 07:46 AM (tyQ8y)

19 Happy Belated Birthday!

Posted by: pam at August 05, 2005 01:40 PM (l6NIn)

20 Happy belated birthday! I know it ain't easy being 63. Now I understand why you don't post frequently. Too many bathroom visits and you can't find your glasses.

Posted by: Michele at August 05, 2005 11:55 PM (ht2RK)

Hide Comments | Add Comment

Goddammit, if i get one more email at work from some farflung coworker, asking me to contribute to some cause, check out some dumbass cubicle humor, support some extracurricular bullshit, or buy a fucking candybar so help me God for their kid's fundraiser, I'm going to lay waste upon the landscape with a firestorm of ash and brimstone.

And don't even think about getting your nannystate biodegradeable panties in a twist about me voicing my opinions; I'm only equally invading your life as you have done mine. If you're going to hoist your pathetic personal life on thousands of people you don't know by clicking the 'Send' button on that network-wide email, you better be prepared from some honest reponses. That's fucking garbage email and I'm not going to accept the fact that you're allowed to fill my inbox with pleas to come check out the play you wrote or give to your local chapter of the Coalition to Save the Three Legged Lama's. Fucking post a flyer in the lounge, so that if I choose to ignore it, I don't have to expend the effort to delete it from my inbox. I don't have time for this shit at work, and if you do then maybe we should consolidate your position under an existing one; and you can pursue your frickin' beat poetry career with gusto, instead of sending out invites via my personal workspace.

Bitch.

Posted by: Id at 07:36 PM | Comments (3) | Add Comment
Post contains 241 words, total size 2 kb.