September 29, 2003

Mapwars

So, it appears that H has surged into the lead in our little Mapwar. I am not afraid. You see, we have different blogging styles and different reader types. Everyday Stranger readers are looking for an orgasmic experience. They want instant gratification. Pleasure now! Of course they are signing her map right away, it is their very nature. Snooze Button Dreams readers, on the other hand, have an involved and accute sense of humor. They are merely waiting. They will let H think she has this thing well in hand (no pun intended) and then yank it from her lubricated fingers at the very last moment (okay, that might have gone a bit too far).

Attention SBD readers with involved and acute senses of humor: Knock it off! Don't be so cruel, sign my map now. Have mercy on poor H. Don't string her along like this. We have a chance to be kind and magnanimous in victory by crushing her now instead of giving her false hopes throughout the week. Can't anybody think of the children?!?

G says I should surrender now. He doesn't think I can compete with a gal writing sexy stuff.

G: Think about any party you have ever been at. There is a funny guy on one side of the room telling jokes and amusing the people around him. On the other side is a cute chick talking about how she McGiver'd together a vibrator so she could get off five times. Who has a crowd around them?"
Me: Could be either. Probably split pretty even.
G: She's also describing the 5 orgasms.
Me: Shut up.

To quote a Tim Allen character from one of the worst movies I've ever seen: "Never give up! Never surrender!"

Did Lee quit? I mean before that Appamatox thing. Scratch that.

Did Jared quit? Did he get the munchies 5 months into it and just say "Forget this crap. Gimme a half dozen meatball subs!"? No, he didn't! How's that for willpower, by the way? Quite an accomplishment on ol' Jared's part, I must say.

But the important thing is he didn't quit and neither are we! That's right, I'm grouping y'all collectively into this. We win together or we lose together. Sign the map (it's on the right side, just under the picture of me orally pleasuring a cow). Support Snooze Button Dreams! Do it for the children! Do it for Jared!

Posted by: Jim at 02:38 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
Post contains 406 words, total size 2 kb.

Comments are disabled. Post is locked.
18kb generated in CPU 0.0227, elapsed 0.1035 seconds.
85 queries taking 0.0924 seconds, 225 records returned.
Powered by Minx 1.1.6c-pink.