My (great)Uncle Johnny used to have this expression that he used, assumedly, as a catch all. Johnny new just about everything about everything. Growing vegetables, cleaning your sidearm, rebuilding a carbureator; all of it. He was an airplance mechanic in DubDub Two before there ever was an Air Force. I guess back then they were just known as The Badasses With A Set Of Sparkplug Sockets.

Anyways, whenever you would say something like "I planted grapes last year and I've still got nothin'."

Uncle Johnny used to go "mm-HM", and then fold his arms sort of thoughtfully. See, he knew that only those scrapply old Muscodines grow in the southeast. It would've been impolite for him to tell you that you're a dumbass. So he'd say "mm-HM" and after briefly scratching his stubbly chin with his thick calloused fingers, he'd steer you off to where you ought to be.

When Jen said that Bane had gone, I felt like saying "mm-HM." Bane used to comment a lot around here, and I could've sworn we did a "How Many Beers" with him, but I googled with no success. Add it to the list of things I should've done while I could've. Goddammit. "mm-HM" was where Bane existed on the spectrum of human emotion. While we were all chewing pseudointellectual cud and choking on diplomacy, he was spitting bullets and breathing fire. He actually said (blogged, wrote, whatever) aloud what we were all thinking while we were going "mm-HM."

Passion without a filter. A 527 in a Gremlin running with an open header. He was caustic, but you couldn't deny his drawing power.

Well Bane, if you're in Heaven - I hope they've got a shooting range. On the off chance you end up in Hell, call up one or two of your old favorites and shoot your way out. But try not to crack a smile while you do it. That might piss 'em off.

Here's to hoping you're looking out for us all. We could definitely use a gaurdian angel rocking a bandalero. In tribute to Bane, I offer the following:
Anne Hathaway sex, lifted from Ace who stole from someone esle:
"In an upcoming interview with Esquire the sexy "Get Smart" star states that one of the most sensual experiences in her life was anal intercourse with her boyfriend. She says "every woman should try it, otherwise they miss out on something amazing". She also speaks about significance of the first time and the trustworthy partner and how the anal penetration makes her feel feminine in a very special way."

This one's for you Bane. I think. I hope? I dunno actually. It's a hot chick who loves to get down, and I figured that would suffice.

Posted by: shank at 07:27 PM | No Comments | Add Comment
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