The most frequent question we get when people discover that we're homeschooling is "But aren't you worried about your boys' social skills"? You know - how are they going to become socially adept without being in a group of their peers?

No, we're not at all worried about that. Contrary to the ready myths, schools are not about socialization. They are really about institutionalization. Where in the world are you regulated in every aspect of thought and deed the way you are in school? Where else are you restricted to dealing only with people the same age as you are? Where else are you given so little autonomy as in school? Take "school socialization" into the adult world and it's as funny as it is ridiculous. The following examples are from an excellent article by Lisa Russell. I can't find the original but Lovely Wife has a copy:

Your Employer is auditing the Inter-Office Email system and comes across a personal note between you and a coworker. You are required to stand at the podium in the next sales meeting to read it aloud to your coworkers.



The Police knock on your door, and announce that because you and your neighbor have gotten so close, they're separating you. You must move your home and your belongings to the other side of town, and you may only meet at public places on weekends.



You go to the grocery store only to find that since you are 32 years old you must shop at the store for 32 year olds. It's 8 miles away and they don't sell meat because the manager is a vegetarian, but your birthday is coming up and soon you'll be able to shop at the store for 33 yr. olds.



You'd like to learn about Aviation History. You go to the library and check out a book on the subject only to be given a list of "other subjects" that you must read about before you are permitted to check out the aviation book.



You apply for a job only to be told that this job is for 29 year olds. Since you're 32, you'll have to stay with your level.



In a group project, your boss decides to pair you up with the person you don't "click" with. His hope is that you'll learn to get along with each other, regardless of how the project turns out.

How many times when you were in school did you hear a teacher scolding a student for talking with something along the lines of "You're here to learn, not to socialize"? A recent case went to NY State Court because the school won't even let the kids freely socialize during their lunch break. The State's verdict? Kids don't need to socialize in school.

Superior Court Judge Valerie Armstrong said Galloway Township school administrators had the right to impose the restriction to maintain order and safety in a cafeteria that serves 260 students in each of four 30-minute lunch periods.



She rejected Giovanni LoPresti's claim that assigned seating violated Gianna LoPresti's rights under the First Amendment, holding that it was not what the girl said after leaving her seat to talk to friends that mattered, but that she had left her seat in the first place.



"It's unfair," Gianna, who finished seventh grade this year, said after the ruling. "When we talk in class, they say wait until lunch, but then if the person you want to talk to isn't at your table, how are you going to talk to them?"

In other words, students need to sit down and shut up.

So when somebody asks me if I'm worried about my boys' social skills because we're home schooling I say "No, but I sure am worried about your kids'."

Posted by: Jim at 06:50 AM | Comments (9) | Add Comment
Post contains 648 words, total size 4 kb.