April 27, 2004

Sorry guys, I'm weak and a sucker for ladies in distress

My apologies to my Victory Coalition allies but I've just got to stump for Ilyka today. The poor gal has poured her heart out trying to help her last place team raise money for Spirit of America and nobody has taken her up on her offer. You see, the Liberty Alliance isn't very organized. They don't have anything like our vBay area where all of the fund raising offers from Coalition members are collected in one convenient place. So castigate me as you will but today's begging fundraising post is for Ilyka.

Five Bucks. What can you get for five bucks? You could get a coffee at Starbucks. Or one of those sickeningly sweet confections in a cup that they call coffee. Look here Ms.Barista, when I want a shot in my coffee the bottle it comes out of better say the word "Proof" on it somewhere.

Sorry, got sidetracked there. I have coffee issues.

What else can you get for five bucks? You could get the really big bag of Doritos with the bold hint of guacamole and lime. You could get three hotdogs at your local QT. You could get a banana split at the DQ. You could get the fat bastard sized value meal at McD's.

Damn, I better stop this line...I'm starting to get really hungry.

The point is, you can get a whole lot of tasty stuff almost nothing of any permanent value out of five bucks. What you can get is a feeling of satisfaction and the knowledge that you've helped our guys who are overseas complete special projects that they want to do. All that and one of three valuable prizes from Ilyka herself!

Yes, that's right. For a mere $5 donation to the Spirit of America, Ilyka will do one of three things for you:

  1. Write erotic poetry (other poetic stylings available upon request)

  2. Let you laud yourself in magnanimous fashion on her own website (ten question interview)

  3. Give you a personal full size tarot card reading (I think it's full size - it's 10 cards anyway). If you choose this option your donation is 100% refundable if all of the things she predicts don't come true by the time you've died.

It is incredibly easy to get these wonderful prizes. Just click on this image and donate at least $5:

Donate here
(click to donate)

A few minutes after you donate you will get an email reply from Spirit of America. Forward that to Ilyka at ilyka[insert at-symbol here]ilyka.mu.nu and let her know which reward tickles your fancy.

Hey, donate $15 and get all three!!

Thank you for your support!

Posted by: Jim at 09:16 AM | Comments (4) | Add Comment
Post contains 457 words, total size 3 kb.

1 For shame... Then again I checked where the links go...

Posted by: Kevin at April 27, 2004 09:47 AM (8T9/5)

2 Shhhh!!!

Posted by: Jim at April 27, 2004 09:49 AM (IOwam)

3 Did I say this was the blogging equivalent of the mercy fuck? Let me revise that: The blogging equivalent of the mercy fuck that has you down at the public health clinic three months later awaiting the results of your GC/chlamydia test. Erotic poetry! Hey, I'd do it if I could farm the job out to Helen!

Posted by: ilyka at April 27, 2004 03:33 PM (VUwQK)

4 Hey now, the offer says "subject of your choice" for the poetry. How many of these guys do you expect to stay away from erotic stylings? Go reread The Somnolence of Clouds for inspiration. ;-)

Posted by: Jim at April 27, 2004 05:19 PM (saeHM)

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