May 04, 2004

Queer Eye for the Fundy Guy

The scene: Two bearded men are asleep in bed in the classic spoon position. The morning call to prayer awakens them. They hurriedly jump from bed, pull on robes and kneel on their prayer mats. They are in the midst of prayers when one suddenly sits up as if coming to a realization.

Abdul: Yassir...last night...you got your anus on my external najaset*.

Yassir: No Abdul, you got your external najaset in my anus.

Abdul: You fool! You attempted to make your anus Pak** using a handful of gravel!

Yassir: The Taharat*** allows one to make their anus Pak using stone.

Abdul: But not when an external najasat reaches the anus! In this case only water may make the anus Pak! You are engaged in prayer with a najis**** anus!

Yassir: Um...I...but...

Abdul: Infidel!!

Abdul reaches into his robe and detonates his bomb belt.

The moral of the story: Fundamentalists do not make successful gay lovers.

* As near as I can figure, an 'external najaset' is somebody else's cock.
** 'Pak' means 'acceptably clean'.
*** The 'Taharat' is the list of 83 rules that Islam specifies to take a dump, brush teeth, etc.
**** 'Najis' is 'dirty'. Not in the naughty sex kitten way like "Oh, you are a dirty little girl" but more in the "soiled with bodily fluids" sort of way.

Posted by: Jim at 01:50 PM | Comments (4) | Add Comment
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1 That is so true.

Posted by: Trey Givens at May 04, 2004 07:33 PM (sYzYp)

2 Brilliant!

Posted by: Mr. Green at May 04, 2004 09:56 PM (1V1ns)

3 Your impressive command of the nuances of Islam and your strangely twisted mind have come together for something greater than the sum of the parts. That's my way of saying - nice.

Posted by: Simon at May 04, 2004 11:18 PM (UKqGy)

4 If THAT's how easy it's done, may the "Coyote Love" sweep the nation! Heh. Remind me to tell you some of my hubby's "war stories," sometime. From Chapter 3: "There I Was With Not More Than My Cap'n Crunch Decoder Ring and a Tom Mix Pocket Knife" -- "Whattaya mean I have to sleep in the communal bunks?"

Posted by: Emma at May 05, 2004 06:02 AM (kpNlZ)

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